What’s Wrong With Homosexuality?
A Common-sense Perspective Which is No Longer Common
September 15, 2014
An opening caveat: Although some reading this will not agree with it, being a homosexual (or being anything else for that matter) should not stop anyone from coming to God. For God accepts all who come to God as they are, as long as you come to God as God is, not as you would have God be. For, God must define us. We don’t define God. And if you truly come to God, God will show you how much He loves you, a love that is immeasurable, perfect and permanent. And God will begin to transform you into what He wants you to be. And what God wants for you is truly what is best for you. You will begin to see everything in your life in a new light. And this will be the beginning of the changes that God has in store for you.
- It’s wrong to assume that all those who believe and affirm that homosexuality is wrong are bigots or “homophobes”.
Indeed, there are certainly cruel people who will hate those who are caught up in homosexuality, just as there are other types of bigots. But Christians who sincerely believe that homosexuality is sinful and who seek to appeal, as fellow sinners, to people caught up in this behavior to forsake their sin are actually trying to do the loving thing for such people, based on what we are convinced is true. You may disagree with our beliefs, but it is completely unfair for you to simply ignore them and accuse us of sinister ulterior motives.
From our point-of-view, warning people caught up in homosexuality of the error of their ways is spiritually equivalent to warning someone who is speeding down a road toward a bridge which is out that they need to stop and turn around. Certainly some motorists receiving such a warning might be skeptical or, even, annoyed by it at the time. But the one warning them is obviously trying to do a good thing. Indeed, one who would fail to make such a warning would actually be guilty of negligent disregard for others. So, when Christians like me speak out against homosexuality (or transgender desires), we are acting out of a desire to help others avoid harm or destruction. That is love, not hate. And this would be the case even if we were wrong.
Furthermore, since we see the consequences of homosexuality to be so dire, we are willing to be so bold as to go against the trend of our culture to try to persuade others to turn back from this path. This does not come from fear. Indeed, it is actually quite bold and courageous to do this today. Again, this would still be the case even if we were wrong in our beliefs. Courage is still courage even if it is for something which proves to be wrong. We are asking that you would be willing to consider why we believe this. And it’s not that we single out homosexuality. We seek to warn all who refuse to acknowledge and repent from their sins (no matter what these sins are) in the same way, as people who have already done this and continue to do so.
So, to label us “homophobes” is a misnomer. Also, the common charge that anyone who is opposed to homosexuality is a self-loathing, “closet homosexual” is clearly false. This is because, if this were true, then the majority of all people throughout history have been closet homosexuals! For, the vast majority of humanity both in the past and the present has identified as heterosexual and considered homosexuality to be abnormal, at best, and, usually, as defective (including the majority of the world’s two biggest religions: Christianity and Islam).
- Sexual behavior is something which must be learned by all people. It can either be learned correctly, according to the design of the human body, or not. And, even if one develops a defective tendency/orientation, this can be unlearned and re-oriented in the proper direction, which is faithful, monogamous heterosexuality.
First, anyone who is willing to look objectively at their own past can recognize that they had to learn how to perform sexually, one way or another. Though things which initially arouse a person are not chosen, whether or not we continue to seek arousal and gratification through these things IS a matter of choice. Accordingly, we can either choose to resist deviant impulses and pursue normal human sexuality, which is monogamous heterosexuality, or we can choose to reinforce deviant arousal patterns (tendencies) through repetition, thus making them preferences or orientations. This is clearly seen with sexual addictions to pornography or various types of “adventurous” sexual behavior with others, such as heterosexual promiscuity and the many “exotic” forms of sexual gratification. Addiction is an appropriate label for sexual deviance, since all forms of sexual deviance resemble classic addictions in tending to drive one to pursue more and more extreme behavior in order to get the desired pay-off and also in their tendency to become increasingly obsessive/compulsive behavior patterns.
Second, sexual tendencies/orientations can be changed. Most men and many women have actually experienced this already in learning how to go from masturbation as their means of sexual gratification to sexual relations with others. For, it is clearly the case that masturbation and sex with others are completely different sexual behaviors. Anyone who has made this transition knows that one has to learn how to perform sexually with another (whether of the same or opposite sex). Furthermore, many people who were previously caught up in homosexual tendencies and orientations have successfully overcome them and become faithful married heterosexuals. Those who say that this can’t happen are simply lying. The fact that most people who do this sometimes experience desires to go back to their previous pattern does not mean that their previous pattern was “natural” for them. Rather, these desires are really no different than any other type of sexual temptation, which most married people are prone to experience in one way or another. It also shows a false bias to assume that people who go from heterosexuality to homosexuality are doing what is natural for them, but not people who go from homosexual behavior to heterosexual. Actually, all the evidence shows that to do the latter is to go from what is un-natural to what is natural.
Third, regardless of how appealing or enjoyable a sexual activity is, this doesn’t make it right or healthy. After all, stealing is appealing to thieves. Most can easily understand this with pedophiles, rapists, and those who take advantage of adult prostitutes or engage in other types of demonstrably dangerous sexual behavior (such as suffocation to achieve climax or serial adultery). And, it is important to note that, in the latter cases, this behavior, like adult homosexual relations, is consensual.
Fourth, to say that having homosexual impulses shows that one is actually a homosexual by nature is simply absurd. Most people who consider themselves homosexual (including virtually all women) are able to have relations with people of the opposite sex. They just prefer same-sex relations. This points to heterosexuality being natural, along with further evidence that will be given under the next point. Thus, people who pursue homosexuality or other types of deviant sexuality simply choose (incorrectly) to forsake normal development in favor of what they have become comfortable doing. This is exactly what Romans 1:26-27 says.
It’s also worth considering that pedophilia, though it is a distinct and far more pernicious form of sexual perversion than homosexuality, is more commonly man-on-boy than any other possibility. This is in spite of the fact that, by all accounts, there have always been far more male heterosexuals (males who are physically attracted to females rather than males) in every culture than male homosexuals. It should be obvious that any culture or sub-culture in which this is not the case would simply cease to exist in a short period of time due to lack of reproduction. Thus, there is clearly a stronger connection of pedophilia to homosexuality. This is one of many dirty secrets about homosexuality which today’s “politically-correct” culture seeks to bury. This is also the case with the dramatically higher rates of AIDS and other sexually-transmitted diseases among male homosexuals, as well as higher rates of drug abuse, domestic violence, depression and suicide (the last of which I will address below).
- Homosexuality is against Nature, as a rejection of normal reproduction.
First, the most basic facts of anatomy and reproduction prove that homosexuality is a perversion of sexual impulse and misuse of the human body. Second, the notion that it is common in Nature is absurd. Animals which forsake normal mating fail to perpetuate their line and support the survival of their species. That different species can be observed to engage in same-sex sexual play prior to maturity or to cohabitate as same-sex pairs or groups (which is simply herding or flocking behavior) is not at all the same as when human-beings forsake normal mating in favor of long-term same-sex sexual relationships. Only humans do the latter. Third, there is no evidence whatsoever that homosexuality is genetic. Fourth, even if it could be found that there is a genetic component, the fact that homosexuality is a trait which tends to prevent normal reproduction would mean that it is a genetic defect!
- Homosexuality or desires to change one’s born sexual identity is against God’s will for humanity, as seen in the frustrations, guilt and unhappiness which it commonly produces; which, in turn, leads to significantly higher levels of alienation, isolation, depression, drug abuse, and suicide. Furthermore, men caught up in homosexuality also incur significantly higher rates of sexually-transmitted and other types of diseases.
The tragic epidemic of teen suicides among people with homosexual tendencies (especially young people) is not due to those who believe homosexuality is wrong. The fact is that the suicide rate among those involved in homosexuality or seeking to change their sex (or gender) has actually increased dramatically in recent years, even though there is far more cultural support for this today than in the past and anti-LGBTQ expression is increasingly frowned upon and, even, punished. But this points to the real reason why many young people with homosexual tendencies or orientations are dying: because they are being encouraged by the culture to ignore their consciences, which tell them that pursuing such things is wrong. It is true that many long-practicing homosexuals have seared their consciences by training themselves to ignore what their consciences tell them (though we say that this will eventually fail). But many others are unable to do this, so their guilt and shame only increase. And, if they continue to do what they know is wrong, this will lead to an increasing inner conflict, which, in turn, naturally leads to alienation, isolation, depression, despair and even suicide.
Therefore, it is a gross distortion to blame depression and suicides among people who identify as LGBTQ on those who believe and affirm that these paths are wrong. It is also important to realize that, while people can be pushed to consider suicide for various reasons, it is actually a fallacy that one can be forced by others to take one’s own life. Suicide is the most individual choice anyone can make. For example, even if one literally put a loaded gun to the head of another and demanded that the other person pull the trigger this would still be the choice of the person pulling the trigger. Furthermore, if we really want to reduce suicides, we need to go back to the old way of thinking: that suicide is wrong, a profoundly selfish and weak act, which does great and undeserved harm to others. And to believe that it ends one’s existence is dubious at best, based on the false assumption that we are only physical beings.
- The Good News in all of this is that there is a Way to be delivered from a guilty conscience due to homosexuality (without suppressing it, only to have the guilt return eventually), as well as from this terribly destructive life choice, or, for that matter, from any other sinful lifestyle. God will do this for all who:
Admit to God that “I am a sinner in need of salvation.”
Believe that God sent His Eternal Son, Jesus Christ, in order to save us from our sins, and that He sent His Holy Spirit to dwell in us and make us holy.
Commit to Christ as our Savior and Lord.
It’s as simple as this “A-B-C”. Homosexuality and other sinful inclinations and patterns can be overcome. There are many living today who have done so. Again, those who deny this are simply lying. While I know that many today reading this will hate this point-of-view (even if your hatred hasn’t kept you from getting this far), what you can’t do is refute it.